Sunday, November 20, 2005

The Ten Principles of True Love

This is an excerpt from my website "Joy is Now" which I've placed here to welcome comments, questions, and refinements. Please enjoy it, and share it with your friends and loved ones. Help me spread true spiritual non-neurotic love around the world.

1. When I say I love you, I mean that I feel a deep, tender, ineffable feeling of affection and solicitude toward a you. I am filled with a feeling of intense desire and attraction towards you. I feel a sense of underlying oneness with you that fills my heart with joy.

2. I give my love to you freely, as an expression of my own passion, and I do so without any expectation of your feelings toward me.

3. When I say “I love you” it doesn’t mean that I feel ownership over you, or that I have expectations for your behavior, or rigid ideas of our future together.

4. I love you for what you are now, not for what I hope you will someday become. I have no plans to change you. I do, however, support your own desire to grow.

5. I respect your right to you having your own feelings, and to your need to learn your own lessons in life. If I can help, I will wait to be asked, and otherwise will allow you to go through the experiences that you need and choose.

6. I will do my best to be in touch with my own feelings and desires, and communicate them to you without any expectation that you will act on them.

7. I am happy with or without you. My bliss is my responsibility alone.

8. I leave you free to be yourself: to think your thoughts, indulge your tastes, follow your inclinations, behave in ways that you decide are to your liking. I have no right to judge or change your behavior.

9. I desire that you be happy. If your time spent with me is not joyful, then you are welcome to go on your way with my love and support still with you.

10. I recognize that we are two separate whole people, who have chosen to walk side-by-side through life for a time. I rejoice in the ecstasy of the present-moments we share together.

This is copyrighted material. Copyright Sam Palahnuk / Brother Wolf. Please do not copy or distribute this material without written permission from the author.

Praise for The Ten Principles of True Love

"That is beautifully written and so true! Exactly how I feel and look at love... Wish more people understood the definition."

- Denise

"Sam, very well put. I have been married over 18 years and my husband and I are still in love and love being together. You sum up a lot of those feelings in what you wrote. "


" yeah, that's beautiful. thanks"

- Dawn

"Your 10 steps are exeptionaly true, esspecialy the indepence of existing as two seperate concious beings..."

- Ty

"I posted your link in my blogs!"

- Mellisa

"Sam, your 10 steps were exactly what I learned how to do in one of my last "relatednesses". What you wrote was beautiful. "

- Mamma

"Sam, I really connected to the points you make about unconditional love. I especially enjoyed the definitions that deal with being responsible for your own bliss and loving regardless of the circumstance or proxmity to that person. Thank you for your thoughts. "

Queen Mab

"That's beautiful Sam! Brought a tear. May I email it?"

- Blue

"I really like your site Sam. It's a great place to go when you don't feel so great! I'll be checking in on it every-so-often as it developes. Thanks! "


"Thank you for your website! I love it. What a lovely gift you have created. I will pass your wonderful website on to my friends and family. "

Love and Light,

"This is quite amazing and very cool! "

- Nick Palance

"I think you're onto something and it's great that you're trying to make a difference in people's lives by bringing things to their attention like that. "

- Simon